You are Not that Into You – Letting Go of Unhealthy Relationships

Who Do YOU Love?

Good Morning Friends!

Have you ever found yourself in a relationship (or two, or 10) where you know you were being abused – on any level – or perhaps taken advantage of in some way? I found myself in just that situation during what I call my “learn it” years. This was a little over 13 years ago before I met my wife.

I was in a relationship with a woman who I allowed to mistreat me as well as cause me unimaginable mental anguish. Why? Because I refused to love myself more than the thought of her loving me. That is, I wanted to believe so badly that she loved me as much as I did her that I ignored what she was doing to me. I was more into her happiness than my own.

I think many of us are like that. We forsake our own happiness to please everyone, be it our spouse, our kids or our job. What happened in my case was I started hanging around more positive people and from observation (and the occasional lecture from friends) I learned to love me without hating someone else. In fact, before I let go of that relationship I thanked her for the experiences I had with her. In further retrospect it was through the pain she caused that I was able to help a friend – the woman who would eventually become Mrs. Stagg – let go of her own destructive relationships.

I offer this insight to everyone I meet that needs it: when it becomes evident that you are not that into you it is at that point that you need to step back and ask yourself why you are placing a higher value on the happiness of others at the expense of your own. As Buddha said, “You yourself, a much as anybody in the universe, deserve you love and affection”.

So, what’s it going to be? Will you continue to forfeit your own happiness or will you endeavor to follow a path that focuses on cultivating your own happiness while doing what you can to help others find their own? Think about it and while you are pondering that question here is today’s Meditate on This affirmation:

I will no longer allow others to compromise my happiness.

Have a PERFECT day!

Michael Stagg